One thing that often brings me down is my unquenched thirst for meaningful connections. I long to meet new people and learn about their lives, to challenge my perceptions. I want to reminisce, bring faded memories back to the fore and stand up for what I know. Without these connections something comes over me. The best word for it is loneliness but that doesn’t do the feeling justice. Disconnected and excluded, even isolated or separate fit better. To battle this need I indulge in a number of mildly destructive habits, such as drinking too much at clubs and trying to meet a hundred people in one night, or watching hours of YouTube and making a hundred connections without meeting anyone.

These quests thus far have been fruitful, in their own way. I made the connection that I desired, but did not find the meaning needed by my soul. Just because you feel lonely does not mean that your alone. Finding the meaning of this is simpler than you might think. Stop looking far and wide and see those closest to you – it is those one loves that brings meaning to this life.

Depression #10

2 thoughts on “Depression #10

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